Romans 12:9-16
When I read in the New Testament one of the lists of behaviors that are supposed to characterize my life, if I am paying attention, I get overwhelmed. Listen again to this list from today’s text.
Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. 11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13 Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
When I started preparing for this sermon and read this text my immediate reaction was – What do you want me to be, a saint?
And then I sensed God saying to me, “Well, that’s exactly what you are, so why not live like one.”
Let me remind you once again of the context for this list.
Romans 12:1-2 are key verses that set the tone for the rest of Paul’s letter. In view of God’s great mercy, all that he has done for us, all that Paul has talked about in the first eleven chapters, we are to offer ourselves to God as living sacrifices.
When we do that, we no longer live for ourselves but daily pick up our cross and follow Jesus. We choose to seek what God wants us to do and say. We continually choose Jesus, or at least we continually try to choose Jesus, over the world.
Because we have offered ourselves to God, we need to resist the world, the flesh and the devil who tell us what we are doing is foolish. Paul wrote that we resist the pressure of the world to conform to the world by renewing our minds.
Tracy preached last week from Romans 12:3-8 about how this works out in our view of ourselves. When we lay down our life as a living sacrifice to Jesus, he takes us and puts us into a community. In this community we are dependent on each other and the church, the Body of Christ, functions best when each member of the community uses the gift or gifts the Holy Spirit has given for the benefit of the community.
God puts us into community for our benefit and for the growth of the church.
Before I get into Paul’s description of how the love we have for each other is to be characterized, let me talk briefly about the importance of Christians meeting in a visible church.
When Jesus prayed his High Priestly prayer in John 17, he prayed not only for his immediate disciples but for all those who would follow him in the future.
John 17:20–23 (NIV)
“My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, 21 that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22 I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: 23 I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.
How is the world going to know that God sent Jesus and that God loves every person on the face of the earth? It is the unity and fellowship of the church that will communicate this.
There are some who come to Morocco and decide they will meet in a home and make that their church. My contention is that this is like taking a lamp and putting it under a basket and Jesus was very clear this is not what we are supposed to do.
Luke 11:33 (NIV)
“No one lights a lamp and puts it in a place where it will be hidden, or under a bowl. Instead he puts it on its stand, so that those who come in may see the light.
When we gather here at RIC each Sunday or when Christians gather around the country in open and transparent churches, the light of Jesus is lifted up and the character of the community that meets in these churches testifies to the truth of Jesus, that he loves us and that he was sent by God to be the Savior of the world.
Christians are free to meet when and where they want, but I think they are missing the mark when they choose to meet in homes and not add their gifts and their witness to the visible church. (The people who need to hear this are not here, so feel free to relay this message to them.)
Paul wrote that we should offer ourselves to God in response to his great mercy shown to us and that we should then begin the process of renewing our mind so we can live as he wants us to live.
We are to live in community, open and visible to the world and allow the love and unity we have for each other testify to the world about Jesus who is the truth.
Now Paul tells us twelve ways our love for each other should look like.
If I simply tell you that you should love each other, what does that mean? When you stand up and smile and shake people’s hands at the beginning of the service, is that loving each other? Is love simply smiles and handshakes and the occasional hug? Listen to how Paul defined the love we are to have for each other. We will cover the first six today and the second half next week.
Paul wrote:
Love must be sincere.
The Greek word Paul used is anypokritos which means without hypocrisy. A hypokritos was an actor in a play. The actor was not trying to be sincere, but to play the role to which he or she was assigned. This works well in theater or movies but it is not at all helpful in life. If Annie comes to me and tells me she loves me, I want to know this is from her heart, not something she read that she knows she is supposed to say.
If I come to church and someone tells me they like my sermon, but don’t really mean it and are just being polite, in what way is that helpful?
I have been around church groups where everyone works hard to praise each other. Affirming each other becomes institutionalized behavior, but does that really, substantially build up the Body of Christ? Or does it merely inject some sugary sentiment into the culture of the church group?
Paul urged us in Ephesians 4 to speak the truth in love. Our affirmation of each other must be sincere if it is to build up the Body of Christ.
I have been around church groups who continually go around saying, “Praise the Lord!” despite the circumstances of their lives.
The psalmists did not do that. When they were discouraged, they wrote of their discouragement. When they were angry, the wrote of their anger. Authentic, genuine, emotion is to be encouraged in the church. And sincere, honest communication is needed.
If someone comes up and asks you, “How are you doing?” ask them, “Do you really want to know or are you just being polite?”
You can’t talk intimately with every person in church, but you can make meaningful the conversations you do have.
The epitome of insincerity was the kiss of Judas in the Garden of Gethsemane.
Luke 22:48 (NIV)
but Jesus asked him, “Judas, are you betraying the Son of Man with a kiss?”
To a lesser degree, anytime we are insincere with one another, we betray Jesus. We need to be honest with each other, speaking the truth in love.
If you don’t have anything nice to say to someone, then pray for that person and I guarantee that God will change you so you can sincerely love that person. God will make it possible for you to be sincere in your love for the members of our church community.
Paul says our love should be sincere and in the second half of verse nine
Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.
John Stott calls this characteristic of love, discernment.
The two verbs Paul uses here for love and hate are very strong verbs. We are to be so passionately devoted to what we love that we hate every evil that works against the good of what we love. Love’s hatred expresses an aversion, an abhorrence, even a loathing. Love’s clinging to what is good expresses a sticking or bonding as if with glue.
When these verbs are applied to the love Christians are to have for each other, it means that we are to be so passionately devoted to Jesus that we hate every evil that works against the purposes of Jesus.
Love is not blind sentiment. We are not supposed to run around hugging everyone and telling everyone we love them without thinking about it. Love is discerning.
But how are we to discern who to love and how to love? If someone comes to church and wears nice clothes and has a good job and lots of money to give to the church, are we supposed to love that person? James, the half-brother of Jesus wrote: James 2:1–4 (NIV)
My brothers, as believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ, don’t show favoritism. 2 Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in shabby clothes also comes in. 3 If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, “Here’s a good seat for you,” but say to the poor man, “You stand there” or “Sit on the floor by my feet,” 4 have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?
That is how the world operates but we are not supposed to be like the world. We need to discern, among the clothing, education, nationality, race and social class of a person to see who is on God’s side and then love and encourage that person.
Every once in a while someone comes to me or emails me announcing they have a powerful ministry of healing and deliverance and wanting me to welcome them to minister at RIC. Am I supposed to welcome them and invite them to come lead our service? I use my gift of discernment and the discerning gift of others to talk to these people and then make a decision about whether or not to work with them.
There has been one case when I told a man he could no longer come to church because he was harassing young women and after repeated warnings, I said enough was enough. In our discernment, we sometimes say no.
I like the way these first two qualities work together. We are to be sincere, real and honest with each other. This is how we are to relate to others in the Body of Christ. But then we are also to be discerning, filtering out those who are not working for the purposes of Jesus. We are to be discerning so we can discern who is a wolf in sheep’s clothing.
When you come to church, when you come to a Bible Study, when you meet with others in our church community, are you sincere? Are you putting on a good face or are you being real and honest about what you are feeling.
You need to discern who really cares about you. It is not appropriate to go up to every person you meet in church and tell them you are feeling miserable. But when someone asks you, “How are you doing?” and you can tell they really mean it, be sincere. Don’t try to be more than you are. Be real, be honest, be authentic and allow that person to care for you.
In verse ten Paul says we are to
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.
This is the quality of affection. Our love for each other is not a formal, superficial love. It is meant to go much deeper than that.
In writing this, Paul brought two family words together.
“Be devoted” translates the Greek word philostorgos. This word was used to describe our natural affection for relatives, typically the love of a parent for a child. The second word, philadelphia, is one we are more familiar with. It is brotherly love, the love of brothers and sisters for each other.
Both these words were applied to blood relationships in the human family, but Paul reapplied them to the tender, warm affection which should unite the members of the family of God
I know that there are some strained relations in some of our families. But I am thinking of good family relationships now and in those relationships there is a strong emotional tug. Someone cannot just step into a family and expect to be loved as one of the family, that takes time.
I returned to the US during my first year in Morocco and visited my youngest daughter who was at university. She had started dating a student and they met me at the airport. I saw Caitlin and my heart leaped with joy. I met John and shook hands with him. “Nice to meet you.”
About a year later they were married and by the time they were married, I had spent less than three weeks with him. He was still a stranger to me, a nice stranger, but still a stranger. Caitlin and John have been married for eight years now and over the years, as we have spent more time together, especially the year they lived near us in Rabat, I have developed a deeper affection for John.
This is why I mention this. I think it is very difficult to have a strong affection for people in the church when the church population is so transitional.
Paul wrote these words to people who lived in established communities which is a rare commodity today. Our technology allows us to do so much more but it also very effectively pulls us apart. We move to Rabat and develop some relationships but then two or three years later, we leave to go to another country or city where we start all over again in developing relationships and community.
Our families are most likely scattered. Community used to just happen and children grew up in homes with parents, grand-parents and sometimes great-grand-parents. Neighbors were neighbors for a lifetime. Now we have to work intentionally to create community wherever it is we live for as long as we live there.
Having a family philostorgos and philadelphia love for each other is difficult, but it is not impossible. It may not happen with us for everyone, but we will find a few people with whom we bond and develop an affection that approaches what Paul is talking about.
Take great delight in this when it happens. This is how it is meant to be for us in the family of God.
Paul continues in verse 10
Honor one another above yourselves.
In Greek society, honor was the proper recognition a man held in his community because of his office, position, wealth, etc. Honor was a personal possession. Slaves had no honor.
So when Paul encourages us to honor each other, he is encouraging us to respect the position we hold within our community. And what position is that?
Tracy, Zak and I are pastors of RIC. We have church board members and Kid’s Church leaders and Sunday School teachers. We have ushers, worship leaders and choir members. Are we supposed to honor each other on the basis of what we do in church? Am I as a pastor to be more honored than others in the community?
That is not what I think Paul is encouraging us to do. Who I am right now is pastor of RIC. But this was not the case for the first thirty years of my Christian life and it will most likely not be the case for the rest of my life.
My position within our community is the same as yours and that is I am a child of God, destined for heaven. It is our position in the Kingdom of God that defines who we are, not what we do for our few short years on earth.
So we are to honor each other, honor each other above ourselves.
C. S. Lewis wrote in his sermon, The Weight of Glory:
It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no “ordinary” people. You have never talked to a mere mortal.
When you see your Christian brother or sister in church, think about this. That person will one day walk the streets of heaven and live for eternity. That’s pretty amazing, isn’t it? You are in privileged company so show the proper honor and respect you should for someone so great.
Verse 11
Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.
Zeal or enthusiasm is not always viewed as a positive quality. Religious enthusiasm is often described as fanatical.
Eric Hoffer, an intellectual longshoreman, wrote his most famous book, The True Believer, in 1951. In this book he talks about the common enthusiasm or fanaticism of communists, fascists, nationalists and Christians. There is a need to believe and men and women latch on to whoever or whatever they think is true. The more the movement demands of the person the better. Serving the cause, whatever it is, meets a human need.
Methodists in the 18th century were described negatively as religious enthusiasts and Evangelical or Pentecostal Christians today are often described negatively as religious enthusiasts.
Zeal or enthusiasm is not necessarily positive.
When Paul was writing about his fellow Jews, he wrote, in Romans 10:2
For I can testify about them that they are zealous for God, but their zeal is not based on knowledge.
Zeal is protected by knowledge of the truth. Now I know everyone says that the cause they serve is based on knowledge, that their cause is the true cause. And it is not my intention this morning to defend the truth of following Jesus. Let it suffice to say that Paul spent eleven chapters doing this, stating the case for why following Jesus is the most rational and intelligent thing we can do. If you do not agree, then we can have a conversation later.
Paul wrote:
Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.
This phrase, serving the Lord, acts as a check on unbridled zeal or enthusiasm. It is because of the mercy of God in our lives, as described in chapters 1-11, that Paul urges us to be zealous.
Enthusiasm does not mean we run around the street telling everyone about Jesus. We are led by the Holy Spirit, not our emotions. We are to be renewed in our minds as we live out our Christian lives. And I do not want to encourage a false enthusiasm that has us praising the Lord and shouting hallelujah when that is not how we are feeling. Remember, love is sincere.
But love as it is lived out in Christian community is enthusiastic and we rely on the community to continually encourage us to be authentically enthusiastic.
You have probably heard the story of a young man who went to an older and wiser man and complained about the local church and said that while he loved Jesus, he did not want to continue to go to the church. He said he could be fine with Jesus all by himself.
The older man said nothing but pulled a coal out of the fireplace and watched it. After a few seconds the red glow disappeared as the coal cooled off and it became black in color. Then the man pushed it back into the fire and within seconds it was red hot again.
That is the message for us. We need to be part of a community. That is how God designed us to live as Christians. And it is living in community that we are encouraged in our faith so our love can be characterized as genuinely enthusiastic.
The writer of Hebrews wrote: (Hebrews 10:25)
Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
Finally, for this morning, Paul wrote in verse 12 that our love should be
joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
The center piece of these three phrases is hope. We have hope, confident expectation, that Jesus will return and take us to glory. This is what enables us to carry on in the midst of great disappointment, pain and tragedy.
When we suffer pain, disappointment or loss, we know that this world is temporary and will not last. So we persevere. We are patient in the midst of crisis because we know what is real and lasting and what is not.
My friend and pastor of Assemblee Chretienne here in Rabat is fighting a great battle in a hospital bed in France. I talked with him this morning and he is doing better. But for four weeks the doctors have struggled to find out what is causing his symptoms and find a cure. This has been very serious and it was not clear if he would live or die. Yves told me he does not think his work here is finished and I told him I have said the same thing to God, as if he needs my advice.
I complain when I have a cold, as I have had for a week or more now. I complain when my computer crashes, as it did a couple weeks ago. I complain when things break down in the house. But these are all petty things.
When it comes to crunch time, when it really counts, the life or death struggle of a friend or family member or yourself, that is when we see and experience the power of love that is not devastated by death or destruction.
It is not because we are optimists or positive thinkers that we are joyful in hope, patient in affliction and faithful in prayer. It is because we know who we are, children of God, and we know where we are going, to an eternal state with our Lord Jesus.
How are we to love each other? We are to be sincere and discerning. We are to encourage affection for each other, as brothers and sisters. We are to honor each other as the future inhabitants of heaven. We are to encourage each other to be enthusiastic about our faith in Jesus. And we are to be patient, knowing that the difficulties and tragedies of this life are not the last word. We have a certain hope for which we live.
Next week I will pick up on the last half of Paul’s list. I pray you will be encouraged to view each other with new eyes and that our love and fellowship will reflect who we truly are.
